TRUST

2019. What a year.

I won’t pretend that my year was any harder or easier than yours. Truth is, we all have adventurous, crazy, sad, joyful, loving, heartbreaking, and boring moments in our lives. My year, although it may have looked different than many of yours, was just one chapter in the many that have come up until now.

I have had a lot of change in my life this year and with change comes learning and growth. What have I learned from this past year of uncertainty, loss, integrity, joy, worship, and glaringly obvious God-winks? Well, here are just a few things:

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1. I’m a lot stronger than I gave myself credit for: mentally, emotionally, and physically. It’s also possible to feel sorrow and joy at the same time.

2. Integrity is incredibly important for your ability to be a witness.

3. I am a 2 on the Enneagram…and a recovering people pleaser. If you want to read a book that will rock your world and help to nip your people pleasing tendencies in the bud read this.

4. “No” can be a complete sentence. People won’t like it. Be prepared to say it multiple times verbally and non-verbally.

5. Sometimes you don’t get what you worked hard for…and other times it’s delayed and you are given the opportunity to pray BIG prayers with those that love you and watch what only HE can do.

6. I am not in competition with anyone. I do not have to do “more” because I appear to have “less.” Our blessings are not a result of good behavior… only God’s grace.

7. I was not the only one to receive bad news this year and I am grateful for His provision. I am praying fiercely for those still in the trenches of grief, illness, fear, or loneliness.

8. People are always telling us something, verbally or non-verbally. It’s up to us to listen.

9. You can’t change people but you sure can change yourself….or at least how you interact with them (and how often).

10. Forgiveness is a command. Forgetting is an added bonus. If you can’t forget at least learn from it. Love others, yes, but also love and protect your heart and mind.

11. When God says He will fight for you, He will. It may take months or years to understand what He was doing in particular situations or relationships but we can always look back and understand how He was protecting us.

12. There are no coincidences with God. When He has a plan for you He will see it through. Our job is to love, obey, and trust Him.

13. Companies, businesses, churches, family, friends, and cars are all imperfect… just like me and you.

14. No matter how long you’ve been in your career there is always something new to learn. Stay humble.

15. I am not my age, my experiences, or my lack of. I am simply me. One soul growing and learning year by year by the grace of God.

16. If you need a good show to numb your anxiety, I highly recommend watching all 9 seasons of The Office. 😂

17. I am worthy of being loved and having the honor of being a wife one day, if it’s God’s will for me. I feel it in my bones that it is.

18. Small healthy choices snowball into big, positive physical and mental changes if you just hang in there. Please, hang in there.

19. Friendship is a sweet gift and should be reciprocally life-giving.

20. I don’t take the seriousness of my impact and witness lightly through this gift of writing. This, in turn, slows my writing down… but I’m ok with that.

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These are my truths that I learned this year and I look forward to learning more in 2020. I pray that you will have a blessed New Year and look around to what God wants to tell you, guide you through, or just love on you with.

God is constantly talking to us. This year He has given me insights, peace, physical notes, worship songs, and literal (month, date, year) timelines of change He had in place before I even knew what most of them meant.

I want to also publicly thank my loved ones (family and friends) that fervently prayed and checked in with me over the months of uncertainty and waiting. I am so blessed to have each of you in my life and am grateful for your love for me.

I don’t know what my word for next year will be but “TRUST” has certainly served me well this year. Maybe I should continue it into 2020 too? No matter what, I know this to be true:

I trust God with my life: my decades, my years, my months, my weeks, my days, my minutes, and my seconds. I am not promised tomorrow and I am grateful for my todays. There is no one else I’d rather trust and follow through them with but Him.

Here’s looking at you, 2020! 🥳